A RECAP OF THRONES: SEASON EIGHT, EPISODE SIX: NO ONE IS VERY HAPPY, WHICH MEANS IT’S A GOOD COMPROMISE?

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By Holly Hill (@hollishillis)
In a nutshell:
Capture
Okay, quick recap.
Tyrion has had a bad week. He backed the wrong person, watched a bunch of people burn alive, found out he was not as smart as he thought he had always been and then found the last of his entire family dead and buried. Yikes. This kind of seemed like the end for him and Dany sent him to rot for a bit until she can have him executed. 
Daenerys has this great scene coming out from the ruins to talk to her people with Drogon’s wings behind her. Emilia Clarke’s acting through her facial expressions have been everything this season and she did not fail us in sending off Daenery’s properly. Her speech in Dothraki was truly awesome. I don’t have a problem with how her arc turned out I just feel like it needed to be done over the course a few more episodes and not completely normal to absolutely fucking mad in two episodes. 
Jon has turned out to me to be the biggest disappointment of all the characters. Even after he watches Dany burn everyone to the ground it takes a talk with Tyrion to convince him that MAYBE his queen is a bit psychotic. I was shocked he was even still defending her at this point. Seems like Jon’s purpose to coming back to life was to just murder Dany in the end. It wasn’t that shocking, but there you go. I think the saddest part was how quick it all happened. All that power, all that time spent getting here only to die at the hand of her lover feet from the throne she hoped to rule. Then Drogon is all ‘fuck that chair’, grabs a dead bitch and fucks off to Essos. Jon is redeemed only when he is forced to go back to Castle Black and give Ghost the pets he deserves. 
With Dany gone – who will rule? Jon is the most worthless choice at this point and I’m just thrilled no one else even brings up the idea that he should rule. I mean he did kill the queen so that might have something to do with it, but damn he has been the worst this season. 
Sam suggests democracy….lol
Sansa waits for everyone to name her Queen…nope. 
Grey Worm tells Tyrion to shut up – he agrees and then makes a speech. 
His speech essentially is that someone who knows all the stories should rule – to bind us together. He means Bran The Broken. And Bran’s all ‘yeah dude I didn’t just come all the way down here for fun with my dozens of furs and vacant expressions’. 
Sansa makes the North an independent nation and is Queen of the North. Bronn gets all the titles he ever needed. Davos is somehow still alive. The breast milk kid got taller, but still looks like a kid that drinks breast milk. Yara is there complaining. Grey Worm fucks off with his unsullied on the water. Tyrion becomes Hand again as punishment for sucking at being Hand. Arya sails west of Westeros. 
Perhaps the most touching of all the scenes this episode (besides Drogon nudging Dany’s lifeless body OH MY GOD WHY YOU MAKE ME CRY), was Brienne writing in the book of knights – a book made of paper that was somehow not destroyed with all that dragon fire. She writes of all of Jamie’s heroic deeds – leaving out his incest and the crippling of a child. It was rather touching. 
And finally, the greatest quote of this episode the one that explains how everyone is probably feeling right now: “No one is very happy. Which means it’s a good compromise I suppose.”
I see what you did there you little shitheads David Benioff and D.B. Weiss. I see what you did there. 
Best Quotes:
  • Tyrion: I freed my brother. And you slaughtered a city.
  • Tyrion to Jon: You have to choose now.
  • Dany: When I was a little girl my brother told me it was made with 1000 swords from Aegon’s fallen enemies. What do 1000 swords look like in the mind of a little girl who can’t count to 20?
  • Jon: Have you been down there? Have you seen? Children burned. Little children BURNED.
  • Dany: We do it together. We break the wheel together.
  • Jon: You are my queen. Now and always.
  • Arya: Say another word about killing my brother and I’ll cut your throat.
  • Tyrion: Bran is our memory. The keeper of all our stories.
  • Bran: Why do you think I came all this way?
  • Sansa: Tens of thousands of Northmen fell in the great war, defending all of Westeros. And those who have survived have seen too much and fought too hard ever to kneel again. The North will remain and independent kingdom, as it was for thousands of years.
  • Jon: There’s still a Night’s Watch?
  • Sam: A Song of Ice and Fire. Archmaester Ebrose’s history of the wars following the death of King Robert. I helped him with the title.
  • Tyrion: Ser Bronn of the Blackwater, Lord of Highgarden, Lord Paramount of the Reach, and Master of Coin. Would you say the crown’s debt you has been paid?
  • Davos: These projects will begin as soon as the Master of Coin and Lord of Lofty Titles provides funding.
  • Bronn: Are you master of grammar now too?
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